I was once told, if you don’t stop, you never grow old. They were right after all but what I forgot was that no matter how old you don’t grow, the people around you do. People moving on with their lives, and by lives, I mean that pathetic bullshit where folks pretend like they figured it all out. I can’t say I’m not angry, because if I could be as stupid as those folks, I’d trade it all for a fool’s paradise. Life tore me apart, or more if I can say, I torn life apart. I made it into a fool’s gold instead, where life has a price, but no real value. I seen opportunities beyond comprehension pass by. I had chances after chances, of being into that fool’s paradise and yet, I let it all glide and I destroyed every trace behind me to a point of no return. I will say though, my happiness always revolved around everyone else being happy. I always did what I thought was right, despite folks being hurt and all. Some folks are just not ready for what I can offer them, and they all want to take a shot at it, not realizing the consequences of their actions. You might say I’m a hypocrite, but truth is, I was. I took care of everybody and now, I’m left by myself, with no one to take care of me. That is why I was a hypocrite. I came to a point, where I saw the beautiful life I let go. It hurts my heart and I only hope I come as an inspiration to those young souls who thinks they have it all figured out. Truth is, nobody knows it all, and when I say nobody knows it all, I really mean it. Every action, has a reaction, and that reaction is a mean motherfucker. It doesn’t take your feelings in regard nor does it care if you’re already suffering or not. At the end of the day, I’m left on my own and my own thoughts hunt me. All I have left now, is the mind of a suffering boy and blank paper where my thoughts fill the pages like a river flowing through the mountains. I don’t believe I’m an artist, because artists are creative; I am not, I simply flow my mind through what it’s been and it appears in front of me. But what happens next? Am I the world’s lost cause, or does life have a different plan for me? I always like to think so, expecting the worst, hoping for the best. A dear friend of mine told me that life goes like this and that someone can’t always hold you out of the water. In the end, you must learn to swim and swim is what I’ll do, even though the endless ocean has only way out: down. I been through this before though, and if I learned something in life, it’s that the only way to bring me down is if I decide so. There is a reason why I’m here, and sometimes I forget, but I remember. No one will be as strong as you are, and if the world needs to see you in pain, there is a reason for that as well. Just remember, deep inside, that little kid is still there…

– Alekor (date unknown)